9/10/2007

My Trip to Maine


Day 1

The first day of such an adventure is always a cumbersome one, depending on one’s view of somewhat strenuous travel. That is to say there is no easy way to get to our cozy little corner of the great state of Maine. About two hours from Bangor, which has the nearest submainstream air field, Pleasant Pond lies deep within the remote stillness of the green state; a novelty which seems to be quickly disappearing in the United States and the rest of the world today.

The car ride to Caratunk, the little “town” which borders our pond, is not unpleasant, though it is neither very interesting nor unique. In fact, it is very similar to driving through parts of the southern Midwest of America. If you were to stop along the way at a convenience store perhaps, you might encounter some friendly folk, or at least a very congenial atmosphere. Mainers pride themselves on their generally pleasant dispositions, though some would argue that they equally treasure their social quirks. That will be discussed more in depth later.

When the car pulls up to the camp, there is a sensation that the trip is not fictional but very real. The arduous travel is suspended until the inevitable return journey, but all one can process is the utter beauty before him, drenched in the dew of sweetness and natural purity that Maine has to offer. The car door opens, and it is not quiet. No, nature is full of life. One can hear the soft patter of trickling rain upon the ground; the trees above rustling their leaves to the wind. Then a bird chirps cheerfully in the distance, singing praise for the rain. All is not quiet here, no; all is vibrant, full of life, truly alive!

Naturally when man first arrives in the wilderness he is first smitten with awe and reverence for the great outdoors. Give it a few minutes though, and he will begin processing how he can “conquer” the newly found land. It is perfectly natural for him to think in this manner and he will devise a plan to provide him shelter, comfort, those things which are afforded to him in the more heavily populated areas of the world.

For us, our camp is our refuge among the wildlife. Sitting afoot a clearly blue lake (or as some call it, a moderately large pond), our camp gleams in the distance from all directions. The cabin itself is adorned with carefully selected slats of birch and pine, with a green trim roof crowning all sides. The woods spill down from the hills above, coming up to our doorstep, but being careful not to sweep us into the pond. Birch and pine and ash and maple are planted all around, with flowers indigenous and exotic adorning the lengths of the camp.

This is a beautiful place of wonder and excitement, though its own tranquility quite often tricks the minds of its visitors who mistakenly believe they will be without a care or numb during their stay. Yes, one might leave behind his worries of the busy world but most assuredly he will take on new thoughts, new ideas that will drive him daily to think of what’s coming next during his temporal life among greens. This haven is not a drug or a hallucinogen; it does not fix the mind with substance based euphoria. Rather, it entreats the spirit to come alive and breathe the breath of life, sending the soul to new heights of joy and creativity. Truly the mind is released to honesty and the heart is given to genuine love.


Day 2

The morning comes quickly the first full day in bliss. The air is crisp and cold; the wooden slats in the floor are chilly, beckoning for the Franklin stove to be lit. Clothed in comfy pajamas and warm slippers, one cannot wait to ascend the creaky stairs up to where the warmth of the stove is waiting for all. The house begins to bustle, its residents moving around tending to the fire, making coffee and toasting bread in the oven. Everything is moving. Everything is breathing. Everything is alive!

As the mind is slowly released, pensiveness turns to cognitive progression. The woods entreat the brain to quicken its pace. Thoughts immediately focus on religion; that awkward subject which makes people cringe when it is brought up at dinner. From there, thinking predictably shuffles through the political issues of the day: abortion, the “disgraced” senator from Idaho, the ailing press secretary, the bomb threats, the five year old driver, the mortgage crisis, the economic upswing and finally the ongoing threat of terror. It is only then one realizes why he escaped to this respite in the first place.

Despite the negativity of the so called real world, there is much positivism in examining the nagging issues of reality from a place of clarity, a place of a more pure perspective. Here the camp releases prejudices and relieves preconceived ideas about most situations. For instance: wars seem less destructive, a mere triviality of human existence. Normalcy becomes curiosity while the queer turns to trite. This is what the purer forms of nature do: ravage the world of mankind.

In keeping with the themes of release, which commonly occur on day two, it must be said that one will most definitely encounter others while on this adventure. Friends and neighbors will undoubtedly process forth from the woodwork telling stories, making food and enjoying company. Families and loved ones will circle up, pass the wine and crack the legs of the lobster, regaling each other with compliments and legends of those who have passed. “Why did the men have to go first?” is uttered by tipsy tongues, but a very lucid point is made. “I’ve known your family for thirty years!” is shouted across the table. Over and again stories are told, love is passed with the potatoes around the platform of fellowship.

The day passes quickly, more rapidly than the night before, and soon all are still in their beds—save for a quiet conversation between two siblings who have known each other for sixty years. Eventually even their kinship is trumped by heavy eyes and they are drawn to their nests. Now the camp is quiet; the cabin creaks here and there but all are sleeping, gently awaiting the coming of the new day.


Day 3

By now one has grown quite accustomed to his new surroundings. He is almost through reading the novel which was supposed to take him the better part of a week to finish. He has made progress on the book he is writing and he has completed the most challenging crossword puzzle. To say that he has reached the pinnacle of his bodily and mental exfoliation would be accurate, although it does not seem to do the experience justice.

High winds and a slight chill on the air accompany the rower in his kayak on the way to South Beach. He makes excellent time getting there but his trip home takes twice as long due to the heavy gusts. During his nautical adventure he ponders the life waiting for him back at home. He shudders to acknowledge that his vacation will be ending in two days time. Friends and family come to mind, and he thinks of his condo in the city. So many people. So many things. It is tiring to belabor such matters while manning a twelve foot seafaring craft against the wind.

The seafarer wonders if he should tire from his timed strokes. Would the distance prove to be too great? These questions linger amid all other obstacles of life while collectively his ponderousness gone astray distracts him from the task at hand. Mightily he pumps his arms, arches his back and tightens his stomach. He pushes through the brisk wind and waves to finally reach his destination. Surely global warming must be a farce, for he had seen no evidence of an increasingly warmer climate this day! Relieved by his accomplishment he settles down to his daytime reading.

Oh the dinner parties! On the pond, no night is simply ordinary. Every night, however, is complete with a social gathering of friends and loved ones who come together for food and fellowship. Tonight a prayer is offered. God is thanked and praised, though not all hearts are sincere in their actions. It is interesting, though, that humans feel the need to give glory to God when they look upon a great feast.

As the night draws the day to a close, feelings of youthful passion spring up. It is commonplace for the camp to evoke romantic affections and often these emotions are not realized until the limpidness of nature brings them to light. And the intensity of these sensations is augmented with each remaining day. These are the sentiments which give us the strength to embark on the journey home. Otherwise, we might merely transform into a bulwark, remaining in our satiated state eternally.

So these quixotic impulses which are universally regarded to be impractical and unreliable actually bring us back to sensibility. Our compass is recalibrated. Our direction is refreshed. Now there is a special someone waiting for our return. And we can finally picture our return without disdain. Giddiness is a side effect and is only overcome with the diversion of a petty task such as reading or house cleaning. We await the impending days, imagining imminent fondness and our eventual return to the forest accompanied by the one we love.


Day 4

The heart is pricked with the sharpness of anxiety as it realizes that the days here are numbered. Only two full days in utopia remain. Cruelly betrayed by Machiavellian emotions, one is torn by his desire to stay and the urgency to tend to his love afar. What little time is left will prove to be increasingly difficult as this tension will swell.

This day was made for all things outdoors. Paddling the kayak across the lake to view the beaver dams. Ascending the mountaintop to take into account the panoramic vista. Soaking up the summer sun and the healing power it has to offer. Today the water is calm. The wind is tame. The sun is unhindered by objectionable storm clouds. Surely this day was planned with intent; its perfection gleaming from every rock, tree and hill, reflecting on a sea of glass.

Thoughts today return to science. Is the lake water more alkaline or is it acidic? What is the status of the fish population? What kind of algae survives in this habitat, and is it in danger of extinction due to the introduction of an-other species? Will the water always be this pure? Will mankind eventually dirty the water?

For seventy years now the pond has not been affected by the surrounding human population. Many would argue this is precisely because of the care which the Pleasant Ponders have given to this lake for the better part of a century. They have pledged their lives to protecting this mass of water, and their children have learned this value, stepping in line to take over the midnight watch. That is what this place does to a person. It builds values and strengthens character. Fervor for the defenseless reaches its acme and one is empowered to fend off all evils.

The tug-of-war that is global warming sweeps over the intellect. One cannot help but mull over this topic repeatedly. The theories on this matter are tossed about like papers in the desk of second grader. The media chooses a stance and force feeds it down society’s throat, just as a kidnapper would gag his victim. They don’t want anyone to have a say, save for the zombies who are programmed to spit out what is being fed to them by the spoon of the teleprompter. Backless, boneless, seedless and sugar free is what the world is becoming. Encouraged to dope up on the mind numbing drug of conformity, citizens of the planet are choosing captivity over freedom at a disturbing rate.

No side, either for or against the theories which state that the earth is warming, has proven anything remotely conclusive. The environmentalist hacks, just like religious fanatics, expect all people to have faith in their church of fear, based upon a hundred or so years of research. For a planet that they claim to be billions of years old, that does not seem like enough information to draw any type of responsible conclusion. But they know the facts, and if you don’t agree with them, you must be a cold, heartless republican who is responsible for hurricane Katrina.

Scientists who are unafraid to point out the inconclusiveness of the limited research however, are slow in forming more studies themselves. Few care about doing the work. It seems that celebrities and failed politicians find it easy to make movies spewing fear and rhetoric from their religious machine. People might take these characters more seriously if they would unhinge themselves from their plush lifestyles of gulf stream travel and multiple mansions and personally make the needed sacrifice.

Then it is time to calm down. Thoughts turn to time and space and the relation to the infinite vortex of light. Will man eventually catch up with light? Will he exceed the speed of light, catching up with the original flicker? Will he meet God at the end of this tunnel? Only time will tell. For now, the boundless splendors of purest nature will content the heart, as the kayak makes its way back to the dock.


Day 5

Bittersweet. The only conceivable description of the final day. Tomorrow travel resumes and its wear on the body is duly noted. One refuses to get out of bed this morning because he knows that once awake, the time will fly by and in a fleeting moment it will be nightfall. Oh, the dreadfulness of the last day! It will be glorious though, as the celebration will be at its highest.

One last trek into the woods; a last voyage on the waves. The hours fly, and the sun sling shots through the sky. Glorious Maine, in all its splendor, luminous above all of man’s creation, the land basks gently in the rays of the sun. These past days of reflection and refreshment will leave with the traveler. Onward to home and upward in life, one does not forget what is learned here, what is gained. Carefully calculated and calculated carefully, the journeyman will remember this place with great fondness as he is imbibed once more into the vastness of life.

9/06/2007

the account of my travels to maine will be posted shortly.

8/22/2007

insured. assured. whatever. it means nothing.
but i will be debt free, and that's everything?
at least one person will benefit from my life
and he deserves it, lord knows he does.

in other news my sanity slowly returns
quietly i regain my senses, which were lost a day ago
my nerves reached a pinnacle; my mind numbed
and i was shot down off of my horse to the ground

new friends. new places. utter disconnect.
but then that is what this life is about eh?
nothing matches, nothing makes sense, nothing is logical
at least not to our mind's eye, for we were not first

here ends the ridiculousness of this post
but my sentiments remain. i try to answer, to exist
yet my thoughts are cast by the wayside, to the dust
my utter being plunged into the depths of the forgettable

8/21/2007

a starry night spreads vastly across a sea of grass
the glistening sky reflects upon the green slopes
repeating valleys bring the scape together
all of the land waits for a still small voice

8/14/2007

flying hearts, beating against the wind
sail swiftly toward the rising tide of storm clouds
the brief shrieks of thunder flash across the sky
their fiery veins coil and contort to reach afar


this heart never stops. i do not know if it ever will. the arms of togetherness cannot seem to touch me, and their grasping only strengthens my resolve. it has been said to me that if i want it, i will do it--or i will obtain it. i can see that being true; however, i am my biggest obstacle. whether or not i want something has absolutely nothing to do with getting it. this would rely entirely on the fragility of my will. and those who know me also know that i am a bulwark of confidence when it comes to decision making.

shall my unjust love forever hang in the balance? will i remain or will i go? do i stand firmly on the ground, or do i take the inevitable plunge? to these questions and more i do not know the answer. i anxiously await my turbulent future, and perhaps i just might survive the bloody war which is sure to be fought.

8/03/2007

the franciscan way

i have recently come to the conclusion that a celibate life, though possibly a lonely life, is a very productive life! that is, provided one does not become distracted with the "wonders" of the world--to which one could just as easily be married. with a bit of concentration, some creative thinking and a strong will one can achieve that which might officially mark his life as productive. of course production is measured differently by varying peoples and cultures.

i have not under any duress nor despair come to any of these conclusions. sheer logic continues to be a driving force in my life. my decision process is really quite simple: i identify a problem or issue, then i clearly define it and consider all applicable factors, form a specific plan to fully reason the issue and execute that plan. without fail, this process continually leads to a decisive end.

the for mentioned logic of which i spoke is not some ethereal force i have especially discovered; rather, it is that which has always brooded over humanity, ever begging our free use of all that it has to offer--though mankind has not always taken a liking to it. this rejection alone defies the very existence of logic, as betterment and benefit is surely to be gained from such a bedfellow.

emotion, however, takes over and suddenly it seems easier to blow up a bus full of infidels. i am reminded of scene from the story of hannibal lecter. when mason verger, a patient of the cannibalistic doctor, was asked why he willingly tore his own flesh from his face, he responded, "it seemed like a good idea at the time." the deranged doctor had so poisoned his patient's mind with intoxicating distraction that verger was driven to do himself harm simply based on the notion of a temporal good idea. the point of this story is that humans, for reasons known only to god, have historically chosen the self destructive path while being fully aware of the better way.

in the immediate present, the path i am exploring could have some negative effects, but i wonder if the long term results will prove to be extremely beneficial. i will begin the process of placing myself in a more permanent independent position. this house of cards could fall, but at least the attempt alone might yield conclusions which will satisfy my mental wanderlust.

7/26/2007

f the news

i will only say this once: i am so sick and tired of hearing what some "correspondant" has to say... especially when it comes to the war in iraq. that is so yesterday. don't think i'm cold, i am simply a representation of the american people. one day, they will be on one side, the easy side; the next day, they will be on the complete oposite side, due to peer pressure and popular dislike. what a fickle society. i am happy to say i am not a part of such a travesty. they can have their cake, but unfortunately, they will not eat it as the predatory world around them will eat them and their cake.

7/23/2007

why do people have this incredibly audacious idea that the world operates on their time? i grow weary of those who do not respect the time or patience of others, only so that they might not feel the stress of punctuality. now of course, many of you will say, "well jack is always late to the party or hangout" to which i will respond that though indeed many times this is true, it is always quite fashionable, expected and dependable. i at least will show up--with bells on. the offenders of whom i speak take no guilt in cancelling their plans at the last minute. that, in my opinion, is unforgivable.

7/19/2007

changing winds

i know many of you have grown weary of my prose
i know that it can be difficult to be interested
therefore, i am taking a short break from my usual style
and i will write of my life from a different perspective

enjoy. or hate.

first, i will address something about which all of you are curious. and the answer is no. at least, not at this time. it is not the right time (by the way, in case you had not noticed, i have chosen to leave some of my more ambiguous stylings in tact). the point is, do not wonder nor worry, for i have yet to embark on such an adventure... or at least purchase a one way ticket.

that being said, i miss many of you. you know who you are! let me say that you need to return my phone calls because it is rude to ignor your friends and to pretend that you are too busy to talk. we all know that we all screen and we pick and choose with whom we will talk. get over it and pick up the phone people! you know i would do it for you--but not forever if it is one sided.

i will be hosting a housewarming party toward the end of august/early september. rather than send out a massive number of invites, i thought i would gauge interest by asking all who are interested to respond, and then i will extend to you an invitation. i detest pandoring.

7/16/2007

unthinkable. unfavorable.
predictable. impalpable.

untrusting.
selfish.

7/13/2007

this world shall fall
no, not at the fault of global warming
for that is certainly a truth that is false
but at the hand of humanity and his ignorance

this country, new rome, shall be one of the first
one of the first to crumble, but last to fall
we will not have the pleasure of dying first
we will witness the last drop of blood spill

this country is filled with masochists who are hungry
bloodlust running wild, encouraged by ideal liberalism
will surely engulf every last one of us
whether or not we inject the heroin ourselves

be tollerant, we are told, and others will tollerate you
that is until their militant hearts take hold
let your children choose, and they will have peace
let your women choose, and their guilt will wash away

murder god, jesus and the holy spirit
and you will wipe out hunger, war and hate
planes crash and buildings fall
then you will come crawling back to church

this nation deserves what is coming by god's wrath
and i for one am dreading that great and terrible day
most assuredly, i have contributed to our guiltiness
and i shall pay my fair share, but still i fear

no one knows it's coming. no one thinks it's coming.
and nobody would believe it's coming
for our hearts have been poisoned, deadened
we are keen only to our self gratification

the day approaches

7/07/2007

global warming is a religion. it requires a faith in a matter which cannot be scientifically proven. it requires sin and guilt: the realization that you are the cause of the destruction of earth (and therefore mankind). it requires that you spread the gospel to others, persuading them that they must change their ways. finally, it requires salvation: which is you changing every bit about your life that gives you too much comfort, that the earth might be saved.

do you see how ridiculous this is? every day, new SNOWSTORMS are hitting the globe. yes, record heatwaves are hitting the DESERTS of america, but how many global warming marches were cancelled this year due to extreme cold? the answer is many! but you will not hear this from major news networks, because they cannot cope with the fact of being wrong. i tell you, the first to carry the honest truth will win the ratings, as the REAL american people (not the visitors, etc.) will be able to decipher the facts.

7/02/2007

for any ignorant imbecile who even thinks about criticizing bush's pardon of lewis "scooter" libby. this link provides a qualified, "shut your mouth" if i've ever seen one. enough said.

http://www.usdoj.gov/pardon/clintonpardon_grants.htm

6/23/2007

for breakfast, a date with radio shack
some transistors, resistors and a heat sink later
it was time for lunch,
which of course was spent giving music lessons
on to afternoon snack which took me to ace,
the place where i found my sledgehammer and screws
by late afternoon it was time to pound away
two hours later, no niche, no tile and ever decreasing carpet
our home is on the way to becoming a home
some drywall, no carpet, new cabinets, new paint, new floors
will help us get there. meanwhile, we do what we can!
and i did not work out today, due to my john henry fitness program
now it is time for dinner, and a delightful menu at that
oven baked butternut squash with apples and garlic
broccoli half steamed sauteed in olive oil, garlic, red pepper
and sesame seeds;
some fresh warm basmati rice will complete the feast
a rewarding meal for a productive day. the end.

6/11/2007

today's news

on global warming-

what global warming? (see various posts regarding this matter)

on the government-

congress seems to like wasting time. oh, and it is seeming a bit racist.

on the war in iraq-

still fighting (and still winning).

on global terrorism-

why can't al gore help fight this?

on paris hilton-

have courage, you will get through this.

on those who prosecuted paris hilton-

shame on you for over indulging in your power.

on the iphone-

only four gigabytes?

on illegal immigration-

if i have to pay a ticket, so should you!

on putin and his cold war tone-

some one's compensating for something.

on the judicial system-

congratulations on your lawmaking; oh, and thanks for giving us barabas.

on joe lieberman-

why isn't he running for prez?

on all republican candidates for prez except fred thompson and rudi giuliani-

there's no way in hell i'm voting for you. especially not that imbecile mccain.

on hillary clinton-

now you can really get back at bill!

on "the view"-

the show still stinks, but elizabeth is amazing!

on satellite radio-

get an iPod.

on the new scion xb-

well i'm inclined to say wow!

6/09/2007

fun. friends. fellowship.
and over a wonderful bud of life.
with our thirst quenched and our stomachs heavy,
we close this glorious day! what a feast.

6/06/2007

heaven.
if not for a few moments of bliss.

6/03/2007

so much loneliness in such a crowded world,
it is almost too much to stomach.
i have realized that one cannot continue the way he began,
if he began under a certain duress; for he is now marked.
i suppose this is why settlers sought out the new world,
they could not continue in their former state.
i am emerging not from a cocoon but from forced naivety.
no longer will i pretend a fictional goodness exists around me,
for it has been long since that ship has sailed.
must i presently find a new world of my own?
this ponderance and more beleaguer me incessantly.

5/31/2007

some thoughts...

don't quit now. i've stood behind you all this way, all the times that you have been beaten brutally. you have suffered through so much, do not fall here, it would be a waste. they hate you now, but you are right, and history will forgive you. i am sorry that humanity is too ignorant to see that, but they once reacted the same way to another great man...

...

ignoring me will not erase me. i am still here. i am waiting. and if i have changed so much, then why am i in such a state? there were many things said, some were good, some were bad, some were right. you tried to plant roots extremely fast and it pushed the soil right out of the pot. you do not seem to see that, but that is exactly how it happened. you cannot expect such forcefulness to be reciprocated with love and care. it was way too soon, too much at once, i voiced this over and over and over and over again. i spoke to deaf ears.

...

why do the terrorists attack public buildings and government landmarks? since it is the "culture of america" that they hate, should they not be attacking the chariot masters who are the driving force behind our culture? why do they not attack movie lots in hollywood? why do they not attack news corporations? why do they not attack the real "devil" behind our bad deeds--the media. are they so stupid that they cannot see this? oh wait, yes they are, because they have no regard for human life. i just wish that for once when people say things (like the terrorists explaining their reasoning for wanting to kill us) that they would be truthful. the terrorists, however, are just like our media--saying one thing, meaning another, and generally unsatisfied with life, so we the common folk must change for them to feel better.